The Choirgirl Hotel

I arrived home from holidays last week to find a box on my front doorstep. Upon opening I discovered the most beautifully wrapped pineapple, an artichoke, and a build-your-own preying mantis accompanied by a letter of welcome from Birdie, the hotelier at the Choirgirl Hotel. What is the Choirgirl Hotel, you ask? I don’t know. Who is this Birdie character? Again, I have no idea. All I know is I have not stumbled upon such a wonderful combination of beauty and madness for a long time. Truly. Readers, dear readers, you are in for a treat. Sit back, relax, and indulge in the splendour of the residents of the Choirgirl Hotel. Georgina x

­Greetings from the Choirgirl Hotel,

Firstly, I must address the question so often asked – Yes, it’s true, I do only sleep with butterflies. With the recent influx of flowers inhabiting our glorious establishment we attract many a creature of flight and I do find that because of the drinking habits of my fellow feathered friends it causes them to snore so loudly. Therefore, to the butterfly enclosure I go for a peaceful rest. The added bonus of these sleeping arrangements is that the steamy environment dry-cleans my feathers, giving them a lustre impossible to achieve in my daily birdbath.

Within the walls of our hotel we celebrate all whom cross the threshold. ‘Tis true that to gain permanent residency certain standards need to be met, and whilst many blue bloods roam the halls it’s the most diverse we are enamored with.

To begin the check-in process for these new arrivals, we don’t require any papers of previous citizenship, however the ability to tell ones story is most important. Because everyone has a story to tell, don’t they? While this task can be quite challenging at times, I find the shy ones respond to a gentle song, especially when accompanied by my trusty assistant plucking away at her ukulele. As her playing is often out of tune, they soon relax and begin to find their voice. It quickly becomes clear that their lives are a celebration of all things endured, the struggles to grow and receive enough nutrition; to bloom in an environment destined to destroy them. Despite all odds, they have survived.

As I capture these honest moments on film, my birdie heart beats a little faster and I know that I’ve helped capture a moment that may never be forgotten, a chance at a new beginning. No matter how long the flowers choose to stay (most will stay forever), they are free to choose. This is something we hope all establishments will encourage and indeed celebrate one day.

Visitors to the Choirgirl Hotel are most welcome at any time, day or night, as are pineapples. Something about the skin excites the preying mantis, our concierge, and it stops him from biting. We ask you to approach him with palms out and head bowed. We look forward to the pleasure of your company.

Yours faithfully,

The Choirgirl Hotel

The Empress

Language(s) spoken: bakeriana Progenitors: proteaceae Likes: gossip Dislikes: the truth

The Diva

Language(s) spoken: victoriae Progenitors: Proteaceae Likes: cuddling Dislikes: combs

The Flamers

Language(s) spoken: gloriosa Progenitors: Colchicaceae Likes: fluffy ducks Dislikes: sex on the beach

Miss Loulou

Language(s) spoken: somniferum Progenitors: Papaveraceae Likes: smoking Dislikes: massage oil

The Ageing Queen

language(s) spoken : neriifolia Progenitors: Proteaceae Likes: jellybeans Dislikes: the duke

The Bee Queen

Language(s) spoken: purpurea Progenitors: plantaginaceae Likes: ear plugs Dislikes: honey

The Seamstress

Language(s) spoken: leucospermum Progenitors: proteaceae Likes: ice hockey Dislikes: pin cushions

The Cardinal

Language(s) spoken: germanica Progenitors: iridaceae Likes: silk robes Dislikes: superstition

The Cloud Troupe

Language(s) spoken: eucalyptus Progenitors: Myrtaceae Likes: juggling Dislikes: monkeys

The Queens Mother

Language(s) spoken: coccinea Progenitors: proteaceae Likes: rain Dislikes: being a mother

Wonderful stuff, huh? If you like what you see here, you should check out Birdie’s instagram feed. It’s brilliant. You can thank me later. Georgina